1. A fine is a tax for doing wrong.  A tax is a fine for doing well.

2. Where do homeless accountants live?  In a tax shelter.

3. Welcome to the accounting department, where everybody counts.

4. What do you call an accountant with an opinion?  An auditor.

5. An accountant is someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand.

6. How does an accountant stay out of debt?  He learns to act his wage.

7. What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don’t?  Depreciation.

8. Why are accountants always so calm, composed, and methodical?  They have strong internal controls.

9. Be audit you can be.

10. How does Santa’s accountant value his sleigh?  Net Present Value.